


Celebrity Dating Life Hacks

by counting2fifteen



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, Fluffy Ending, Interviews, M/M, Secret Relationship, arguing but like productive arguing, communication is the secret to a healthy relationship, pre-coming out era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-15
Updated: 2020-06-15
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:40:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24728356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/counting2fifteen/pseuds/counting2fifteen
Summary: An interviewer asks some awkward questions about what it’s like to date as a public figure.
Relationships: Dan Howell/Phil Lester
Comments: 14
Kudos: 73





	Celebrity Dating Life Hacks

“So, dating as a celebrity,” the interviewer said, and Phil froze. “That must be hard.”

“I, uh,” Phil stuttered, looking at Dan, who was tight lipped, fingers whitening around his microphone. Dan glared at him, and Phil quickly looked away again. He cursed at himself. This video clip was going to end up in a million phan proof compilations, and the longer he took to answer, the worse it got.

“It’s certainly an experience,” he managed. 

“It’s really hard _keeping things private_ ,” Dan interrupted. 

Phil hoped the interviewer would notice the heavy emphasis Dan put on the latter half of the sentence, but no such luck. She steamrolled on ahead. “Oh really? How?”

“People feel entitled to information about our personal lives,” Phil explained, trying not to wince after accidentally saying “our.”

The interviewer really didn’t seem to be getting the hint. “So you’ve had issues in relationships before, with your fans wanting to know exactly what’s going on and you not wanting to give them that?”

“Yes,” he said. Also creepy interviewers for mid-tier YouTube channels, he wanted to add, but he didn’t. 

She nodded, her brow creased in sympathy. “So how do you handle that?”

“Well, it’s something you have to be up front about,” Dan interrupted.

Phil nodded and smiled, gritting his teeth. He thought he and Dan had agreed to minimal outright lying about their relationship, but he apparently thought wrong. “Like everything else in relationships, it’s really about communication,” he added, hoping his smile didn’t look like a grimace.

Dan rolled his eyes. Phil shot him a glare. The interviewer continued on obliviously. “Well, that’s good to hear!” she said. “Unfortunately, it looks like we’re almost out of time, but it was really great to get to know you two.”

Phil relaxed, noticing the way Dan’s shoulders dropped too. “It was great to meet you too,” he said.

“God,” Dan said when they were lying in bed that night. “That interview was a disaster.”

“Yeah,” Phil said coldly. “It was.”

Dan frowned, pulling back a bit so he could see Phil’s face. “Are you mad at me?”

Phil sighed, sitting up. “I don’t know, Dan. What do you think?”

“Hey.” Dan placed a hand on Phil’s arm. “That’s not fair. I asked for a reason.”

“Sorry,” Phil muttered. “I don’t know, today at the interview, it just seemed like you were… lying.”

“So?” Dan said, sitting up. “You were lying too. We’re _both_ lying about our relationship. I thought that was something we both agreed to do.”

Phil sat up too. “You were lying about… more than that.”

Dan rolled his eyes. “What did you want me to say? The truth? We were kind of backed into a corner there, Phil.”

“I don’t know. You didn’t need to imply that you’ve had other relationships. People are going to run wild with that.”

“As if that’s not what you did when you agreed with her about having privacy issues in relationship before.”

“That’s different,” Phil protested.

“How?” Dan demanded.

Phil struggled to find the words. “I was just agreeing to something someone else said. You were saying something new. It’s just- it’s different.”

Dan rolled his eyes. “Why are you so worried about this, anyway?”

“I don’t like lying.”

“Again, that is what we are doing. I thought we agreed on that.”

“No, we agreed to not tell people. That’s different.”

“It’s not,” Dan said, unimpressed. “It’s just a different way of misleading people.”

Phil shook his head in disbelief.

“What?” Dan said.

“It’s different,” Phil insisted. “It just- it feels different.”

Dan shrugged. “It feels the same to me.”

When Phil was silent, he pushed on. “What did you want me to say in that situation anyway?” He mimicked the interviewer’s voice from earlier. “‘How do you handle fans invading your privacy in relationships,’ ‘Oh, we fight about it constantly because my boyfriend has some sort of weird hang up about what constitutes lying.’”

“We don’t fight about it constantly.”

“We fight about it often enough.”

They did, Phil supposed. He’d like to say the stress of being closeted wasn’t getting to their relationship, but he had to admit that lately, it had been. And he didn’t like it.

“Just.” Phil’s voice was small and watery. “It just, I don’t know, it feels like you’re ashamed of me sometimes.”

“Phil.” Dan closed his eyes. “I’m not ashamed of you.”

Phil felt silly for needing to hear those words, for ever doubting Dan. He loved Dan. Dan loved him. It was ridiculous to even suggest anything else.

“I just want us to be safe.”

Phil bit his lip. “I know.”

“Now come back here, okay?” Dan held his arms out, and Phil fell into them. He took a deep breath, searching for the sound of Dan’s heartbeat, steady and familiar, relaxing when he found it.

Some things didn’t need to be shared. It didn’t make them any less real.

**Author's Note:**

> [like/rb on tumblr](https://counting2fifteen.tumblr.com/post/620954718248779776/celebrity-dating-life-hacks) if you'd like!
> 
> i feel like i haven't posted in AGES oops, but my prb fics are coming in various degrees of soon-ness so that'll be fun? i hope


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